Cuda 13.0 compatibility #27636
### Pull Request Readiness Checklist
See details at https://github.com/opencv/opencv/wiki/How_to_contribute#making-a-good-pull-request
- [x] I agree to contribute to the project under Apache 2 License.
- [x] To the best of my knowledge, the proposed patch is not based on a code under GPL or another license that is incompatible with OpenCV
- [x] The PR is proposed to the proper branch
- [ ] There is a reference to the original bug report and related work
- [ ] There is accuracy test, performance test and test data in opencv_extra repository, if applicable
Patch to opencv_extra has the same branch name.
- [ ] The feature is well documented and sample code can be built with the project CMake
### Issue
CUDA 13 deprecated some fields, resulting in build failures with CUDA 13. This updates to use the replacement API.
The reference to the deprecated features is here: https://docs.nvidia.com/cuda/cuda-toolkit-release-notes/index.html#id6
### Testing
This was testing by building on the following configurations:
OS: Ubuntu 24.04
CUDA: 12.9, 13.0
jmackay2
Hamdi Sahloul
Alexander Alekhin
luz.paz
Mathieu Barnachon
Vladislav Vinogradov